Zodiac Signs

What You’re Actually Watching, According to Your Zodiac Sign


For the ship to sink.

As a born leader, Aries, you’ll find yourself at the helm often in life, but not every endeavor will be bound for success. While it won’t be in your power to control the performance of your team, crew, or colleagues, you will have to be accountable for it. Your sense of honor won’t let you walk away from your responsibilities until the bitter end, but deep down you can’t help but wish for the finality of a failure that is all but certain. Though it’s not as bleak as having your life on the line, you are counting down the days, hours, and minutes until it will be socially acceptable to walk away from whatever mess you’ve been stuck in.


To give yourself permission.

Everyone knows that you know how to enjoy life, Taurus, but they don’t realize how fiscally responsible you really are. You budget for the good things in life, forgoing the five-dollar coffees to afford the fifty-dollar bottles of champagne. Everything adds up because you have the self-control and wherewithal to keep track of your income and expenses, so it can be hard when you have the itch to really splurge because you need to justify every large purchase. You’re in a battle with yourself about whether you really deserve the designer watch, the crystal vase, the silk scarf, or a new piece of art. All that’s standing between you and this prized possession is your own permission.


To call ‘bullshit’ on a particular person.

You’re so tired of keeping your head down and your mouth shut, Gemini. You have the highest tolerance for bullshit out of any of the zodiac signs, but even you have a limit. Someone in a position of power relative to you has been leading you astray and has been making your life difficult by not following through with their responsibilities and promises. Whatever plan was supposed to be laid out at the beginning of the year is still not finalized, and you find yourself stuck in limbo because of others’ lack of organization. You want to speak up, but it wouldn’t be good form. If things continue down the same path much longer, you won’t be able to help yourself.


For things to feel safe.

Something in your life is still in its early phases, Cancer. Be it a job, a relationship, or a move, you’re still going through the fumbling motions of trying to settle in. You are longing for the feeling of trust and familiarity that comes with a proven track record. You miss the luxury of going on auto-pilot with things like answering e-mails, getting ready for a date, or sleeping in your own room. Everything feels like a new pair of shoes that need to be broken in before you can walk around comfortably, and you’re getting a few blisters along the way. The fight or flight feelings will slowly fade away once you hit that benchmark of familiarity.


To find your people.

You know enough people to run for local office, Leo, but still, find yourself daydreaming about fictional friendships. For whatever reason, you haven’t gone as deep with your inner circle as the relationships you see described in books and television. You want your Ron and Hermione, or your Phoebe, Ross, Rachel, Monica, Joey, and Chandler but don’t have any evil wizards to fight against or an apartment building with neighbors in your age range. You are the ultimate chameleon, mirroring the habits and interests of the people you do encounter, but the insincerity leaves you deeply unsatisfied. You are waiting to discover that group of people in which your personality just makes sense and compliments the whole and vice versa.


The moment when you can stop performing.

You are the cool one. The smart one. The one who has it all figured out. The one people come to for advice or listen to speak on a stage. You have a persona. A persona people enjoy and respect. And then, late at night, you come home and take off your pants one leg at a time, dig through the fridge for something to munch on and let it all hang out like the rest of us. This is the moment you wait for every single day, wishing that there was someone you could share this time with, someone you could be your real self around, instead of the curated, professional hustler who always, always has to be on.


Validation of your opinions and talents.

You know a lot about a lot, Libra. You are well-read, cultured, and up-to-date on current events, but you are waiting for someone you see as legitimate in a field to validate what you have to offer. In your fantasies, people are knocking on your door to get your soundbite, offering you opinion columns, drawing up contracts for record or movie deals, or any other pursuit that fits your fancy. You are itching for that thing that will take you over the edge from amateur to something more, be it professional, expert, instructor, or commentator. If you really want to get there, it may be you who has to knock on a few doors for the opportunity.


An end to all the games.

You’re five moves ahead of everyone, Scorpio, and while that does have a certain appeal of its own, you long to be able to get from point A to point B without a plan elaborate enough to support the plot line of another bank heist feature film. You want to just say what you’re thinking, express your affection for someone, and not worry about reciprocation or power dynamics. For whatever reason, even though you want to, you haven’t been able to let yourself. You’re waiting for the right job, the right relationship, and the right circumstances for this level of candor. It could be that all this holding back is the thing holding you back from where you want to be.


To align your career to your interests.

You find yourself caught between a rock and a hard place, Sagittarius. Your lifestyle doesn’t come without a price tag, and funding the trips and adventures your heart desires requires a certain income level. You likely describe your job as what “pays the bills”, but there is likely a gap between your responsibilities and your interests. You envy friends who have made career pivots in the last few years but feel intimidated by the prospect of starting over at an entry-level salary, or even worse, needing to pay for additional education before you can get a foot in the door. You are secretly waiting to discover the right opportunity that is intellectually stimulating without putting your income at risk.


Someone to show their true colors.

There is someone you can’t stand, Capricorn. They’re not a frenemy or a nemesis, but you also can’t avoid them either. A colleague, an acquaintance, a neighbor you come into contact with frequently who is a source of consistent tension. It’s abundantly clear that the two of you don’t see eye to eye, and the animosity is palpable. You are frustrated by this person’s ability to hide these qualities and get ahead because of it. You know complaining or trying to convince others will only make you look jealous or bitter, so you keep your mouth shut but watch them like a hawk, waiting for them to slip up, or for others to piece together the evidence in plain sight.


The latest poll results.

You are like a horse at the starting gate, Aquarius. You are ready to embark on a campaign, enter a competition, or go head-to-head with the establishment. However, you find yourself in a holding pattern, waiting for public opinion to be on your side. You’re sure your time will come any second now, but you can’t kick your plans off without data to back them up. You likely feel a little guilty or cowardly for waiting, for trying to stack the deck in your favor, for not trying if you’re bound to lose, but just remember you are being responsible with resources. Everything you’ve prepared is crucial to your success, and your time and money are not limitless.


Your favorite show to be uncanceled.

Pisces, I feel for you, I really do. In this streaming age, we’ve all been burned by a cancellation that felt premature or unwarranted. But here you are, years later, still checking Reddit and Instagram daily, searching for any sliver of hope that The OA is really just orchestrating the biggest publicity stunt in television history (or a similarly unlikely TV revival). It’s not your fault, the buzz and speculation are too hard to ignore, and the creators likely want to cash in on the publicity, but it’s not fair to your emotions, Pisces. The disappointment gets worse the more times you’re teased by rumors designed to do just that. Fans as loyal as you deserve more.

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